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if you can check to see if I posted something on here, but not apologize…
revaluate.
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Earlier I attempted to type out what was going through my mind. But I realized how crazy I sounded.. so instead I went to mcdonalds.. alone. But now that I have a full belly and a some what better head on my shoulders I have more of an explanation of what’s happening to me. Lately, I’ve been finding myself biting my lip, bending my tips back, rubbing my fingers together to create so much friction it burns. I thought I was trying to hurt myself, I thought I was crazy, psycho, all the above. But while I was driving around with no where to go, it hit me. I love life too much to leave it, so I’m doing those mild pain inflicting things to make sure I can still feel something. My minds way of keeping me from going numb to the hurt and emptiness. Because if I go numb, I won’t be able to come back.. which scares me the most.
I just miss how it use to be.
“everyone always leaves”
xx
(Source: innocentlyreckless)
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I wish there were more positive things to look forward too right now, because being optimistic is getting pretty fucking tough with everything slowly crumbling around me. I just wish I could be excited about my birthday, that’s all.
:[
(Source: innocentlyreckless)
